Who are you?

When asked who you are what comes to your mind? Most people would answer something along these lines:

My name is Reena and I am a yoga teacher, practice Thai yoga massage and am a coach. I also work at Dal Legal Aid as an office manager. I am quite spiritual. I’ve had many ups and down over my life as I am also an alcoholic who has been sober for almost 18 years, have suffered from depression and am a kidney transplant patient. I’m a mother of one girl who is now 27. And on, and on.

Is any of that who I am? Nope!

Those are all things I do, roles I play and experiences I have had. None of which are who i am at the core. So who am I?

Once we get beyond the doing, we boil down to our core. The place where our intentions lie, where our values come out and where our authenticity lives. I am an imperfect person , we all are, and that’s ok. I am passionate, I am truthful, I am peaceful, a communicator, a loving person, etc. None of these ear done perfectly, for sure, but it’s who I am and who I intend to be each day. I have my moments when my communication skills seem a bit lacking, but never intentionally. I have moments when I’m less than honest, but they are few and far between these days as I work on myself and my authenticity. All in all, the items I listed are me, along with others.

In a spiritual level, we can simply say, I am. However, if you’re looking for growth, it’s helpful to go a little bit less deep. It’ difficult for most people to work on such an abstract level.

So, who are you? Have you ever considered it? What are you passionate about? What do you work on in your life? Those questions might help you get to the truth of your core being.

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My New Life

I’ve written pretty extensively over the past year or so about all the things happening in my life, from kidney disease with decreasing function, having a fistula created in my arm, the work up of a donor, starting dialysis and finally having a transplant. It’s been a year with a lot of ‘feels’, up and down and I’ve done my best to provide a very honest view of it all. I also write about how I felt it was all leading to something, a new life, a new perspective and greater self awareness. I’ve been acutely aware of that even in my moments of depression- an underlying feeling that all would work out.

I’m 5 weeks post transplant today and feeling quite good. I’m still a bit swollen around the incision site, but the incision itself is healing very nicely. My energy is coming back, I am now planning the future. I’ve been updating my website, starting a little advertising for my services, taking courses in everything from marketing to coaching and I feel I’m turning my life in a new direction; one where I can live from my authentic self. One of love and caring and respect for others.

In the past, I had some level of fear of getting to know people, of getting too close and of not being accepted. That fear led me to take a very different route than the one I feel in my heart I belong on. And I know first hand the result of not following your authenticity. High stress, unhappiness, conflict and general feeling of being unwell. I will never go back to that, I respect myself too much. From the moment my mother died in December of 2016 until the transplant happened in March 6, I’ve been through a lot. I went to an all time low with mom’s death and managed to fight my way back. I’ve grown exponentially through this journey. I learned all that really matters to me. And through my own journey I’ve learned that I want to help others find their path in life, find their peace, their fulfillment. I’m finally ready to take my place. I no longer fear what others might think, because I know I’m living my true life now. I’m sure I will have my doubts still, but I know I can work through them and come out stronger than ever. And isn’t that the only thing any of us can ask for? To come out a better version of ourselves?

I hope that those reading this post can find their authentic selves too. Work with someone if that’s what you feel you need. There is no shame in asking for help. We are a community that needs to work together and support each other. We all have our talents and we can all use them in a way that lifts each other up. Who will you help lift up today?

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